Trickle-Down Intelligent Design Flawed from Above

The intelligent design movement took another step backward when Judge E. Jones III ruled against a Pennsylvania school board’s attempt to slip creationism into high school biology classes. Proponents of intelligent design contend that life forms are too complex to have been formed by natural processes (that’s evolution to the rest of us) and must have been the workings of a higher intelligence, preferably someone or thing whose intelligence quotient is greater than the cumulative I.Q. of the Dover School Board.

The staff at the Witsend Think Tank, TANKED THOUGHTS PARADOX, has chewed on the notion of “intelligent design” and has released the following BOTTOM-FEEDER FIVE:

If all life forms are a by-product of a higher intelligence, who in their right mind would’ve designed:

5. Bill O’Reilly

4. Anyone who genuinely believes that there’s no such thing as a stupid question

3. Jehovah’s Witnesses

2. The Illegitimate Child of Democracy, King George

1. Infomercial Actors